Anyway, Sex and the City is one of my favorite television shows/movies of all time for the the following reasons: the clothes, the writing, the acting so good you actually think Kim Catrall and SJP like each other, New York, and the fact that it's one thing almost anyone with a female reproductive system can relate to. Every girl has their favorite character, and will judged accordingly when they admit who it is . (If you say Samantha, everyone will think you have an STD).
Honestly, I wish I was a Carrie, because I want to be a fabulous writer who believes in love and lands Mr. Big, But realistically, I am a Miranda. I am cynical, witty, mean to men, and smarter than your average bear. I'm sensible and I think all my friends are stupid for having feelings.Whatever, Mirandas of the world could take over the planet, while the Carries are too busy crying into flan because their boyfriend just got caller ID (90s girl problems).
But back to my main point, I've watched the Sex and the City movie an obscene amount of times this summer. Mainly because I'm lonely, and I watch a lot of E! in the middle of the day. And now, because I have nothing better to do because DIRECTV is currently in a dispute with Comedy Central and MTV, I'm going to list the best moments of the movie so bad it's good, Sex and the City: The Movie.
7. The Opening Credits
This is it. It's starting. It gave me the same feeling yesterday when I watched it alone in my bed, as it did at the theater when I was a freshman in high school. I went with three of my best friends and my mom, because we were only 15 and it was rated R. I had been watching Sex and the City since I was ten. Don't judge, I have a progressive mother who wanted a girlfriend to watch it with, and taught me it was okay because 40-year-old women can do whatever they want. ( She made me leave the room and cover my ears during the sex scenes. See, parenting did occur).
The opening credits are great because they let you know your about to watch the characters you love run around NYC with their boobs out yet again. The credits are perfect because it's Fergie singing over the original theme, because it perfectly sums up the entire series in two minutes, and you see SJP for the first time. It's perfect because she's wearing a white cocktail dress with a giant hibiscus on it in the middle of the day, and no one questions it.
6. The New Year's Eve Montage
This would've ranked way higher up on the list, if they hadn't included the ridiculous shots of Samantha and Smith wearing matching black, sequined robes (They look like strippers backstage before their first time on the pole). I love this because I love the song it's set to, I love seeing Big eat dinner alone, and I love what it's about. This scene is about the fact that the real friends are the people who know when you're more upset than you want to admit (because you're a Miranda and too proud), will get out of bed for you, and then run across Manhattan in a sparkly hat so you don't have to eat Chinese food alone.
5. The Closet- Cleaning -Champagne-Induced- Fashion Show
By far one of the cheesiest parts of the movie, and by that I mean one of the best. This movie is, at its core, the definition of a chick film, and what woman does not drool over the try-on-a-bunch- of-crazy-outfits-while- catchy-tune-plays scene? I die over this scene because it is one of the times where I totally forget they are actors, and I think they are just bunch of best friends getting hammered in the middle of the day. It's just so fun, you can't hate it if you try. And don't lie , when she comes out in the original pink ballerina dress, you die a little bit inside (also, there's a naked baby).
4. Samantha's Rally
A lot of people hate on Samantha, they say she's too old, everything she says relates to penis, etc. But right after the infamous wedding meltdown, we are reminded of what Samantha is truly there for, the rally. Whether it's making them go eat raw food or go to nightclub where you sit in beds, Samantha has always been there to make the other biddies actually do cool things. Everyone has an exhausting friend like this, but this friend is also exceptionally good at coming to the rescue. The minute Carrie's life implodes, Samantha Jones is on the phone and getting shit done. She books them all on Carrie's honeymoon, convinces the boring moms to go, and then spoon feeds a comatose Carrie some oatmeal-ish material. Then she makes that pathetic rag doll get out of bed and drink margaritas. Let's face it, without Samantha ,Carrie would've drank herself to death, Charlotte would stare at her kids all day, and Miranda would eat pizza and drink beer alone in Brooklyn.
3. The Foam
Only true Miranda fans really appreciate this scene. Because only true Miranda fans understand how hard it is to not do the logical thing. If your husband cheats on you, you end it. There's no gray area with Miranda, and love has nothing to do with it. Her friends see that she's being too harsh and still loves him, but they are scared of getting their head bitten off by the scary ginger lawyer. I'm going to get all film student on you now, and say that's hard to film someone accessing their emotions. It's hard to show why two people are perfect for each other , and why someone loves someone without the character saying " I love you because...". The espresso foam on the lip clearly shows why Miranda needs Steve. She needs him to make her lighten up, and to tell her she has goddamn foam on her lip.
2. The One Way Street
This one doesn't need much explaining. Big deciding he needs to turn around. SJP in a Vivienne Westwood bridal gown, going all Elin Nordegren on Big with a bouquet instead of a golf club. Not to mention Charlotte delivers the best movie "No!" I've ever heard. You can always count on protective, neurotic Charlotte to be a total spaz in the middle of a street.
1. Brunch
I could watch these bitches have brunch and make bad puns all day. I could watch these bitches have brunch until Carrie needs an oxygen tank and Samantha is in a wheelchair because of a latent sex injury. It is just so cheesily perfect that Carrie has a brunch reception, it makes me want to die a happy woman. After marrying Big the way she should have in the first place, he invites her friends, (because he was engineered in a lab to be the world's most perfect man) and they have a low-key reception at a breakfast place. And they're all together in the city , and everything is just as sexy as it was in the very first season. (Insert Carrie column-ending pun here)
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